Occupation: English and French student at Brighton University, and general know it all.

Hobbies: Ardent Middlesbrough supporter (Why?), plotting the demise of any and all boy/girl bands the world over.

Nickname: Despite being a valued member (or so he tells us) of the Brighton University second hockey team, Andrew keeps getting assaulted by them. (perhaps its a personality problem) In the first year, after a night out drinking, the hockey team shaved the front of Andrews head. This left him fringeless for ages, and pissed him off no end. In the second year, someone kindly put a hockey puck through his teeth and smashed his mouth form him. He needed several stitches in his mouth and had a hairline fracture in his jaw, (It didn't shut him up for long though) Andrew is currently undergoing long term dental work. (although, I can now report that he is back on solids). However, I fear what is going to happen to him next year, as if the hockey team continue to escalate, it could be fatal.

Personilty: Andrew is every bit as sarcastic and bitter as Chris "Not The Famous One" Evans and is also sharper than a knife when it comes to picking up on any funny comments that people come up with. Haslam loves to hurl abuse at all of his friends, but can't take it at all. I recently embarked on a campaign of hate mail to him over the internet. Andrew was offended immeadiately and made several death threats. I am glad to say that despite what I may have called him, Andrew is NOT gay.

Worst Feature: His personality.

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